Sunday, October 14, 2012

A page from my diary.


Sunday, yipee. Well i don't do anything on Sunday, may be that what makes it special. I had Sundays almost for more than 8 months in Bangalore. How i fucking enjoyed those days in "shivshakti nivas". Near the graveyard, behind the primary school, and not a tarred road. Sssssssssuperb. Smoking packs of cigarettes. Flakes, "Navy cut", L&M lights, beedies, small. 10s pack would not last for a day for me alone. Shifted to 20s and they started getting over faster. Along came "Captain black" black Cavendish blended tobacco(unrolled). HUKKA joined a few days later. Eeeeeeeeeeehaaaaaa. "Smoke on the water" came alive and song meant so much more. Ganja, some call it. We called it STUFF. Mysore being among the top priorities, iduki gold, katmandu, tannery road, haskotte, ooty, kodaikonal, manglore. Nothing mattered as long as it kicked our dad's DNA ass. Stone the fuck out of us. Drinks had made the "only" show-case in our house and that being in the kitchen. All thanks to Phatcouger to come up and arrange them. But special thanks to the guys and very few girls to dutch in for the bottles. Whiskey, vodka, tequila, rum, brandy, wine, bEEEErs. Ah those crazy nights. Dust-bins thrown on terrace, cricket matches in the room,  broken glass window, shrek in the bathroom along with spider-man looking at you. Awesome. Gullu jumping out of the bed and landing on his "arse" and wondering while asking,"Did anything happen to my head?". Chia trying new ways to smoke and his crazy idea's, sarith fighting for his freedom, prashant's sobbing nights, my ass being kicked & whacked from every fucking possibility and non-possibility, Sagar being the crazy "sid" and his SANTA mind filled with new things to tell, to gift, to buy. Romel being fucked out of his mind in any way he could try. Painter and artist would come alive at most awkward moments and then akshay calling me up, "Harry, so where are you?" and then hazed up till someone else join in to make it Purple haze. Sometimes drunk girls and boys popping in to just sleep. Girls and boys we have not even seen sleeping on the bed or anywhere they could. Condom pack on giri's table or on his bed. Guess what he is still a virgin. Random people made it a bed to fuck. Our kitchen a lifeline usually dead. Empires, bismilla gave us food that what was affordable. Bike rides to "murder road", going walking with girish to kammanhalli and passing in front of the girls hostel and looking at them from side windows. That girl with hot body usually sleeping on her flat white creamy belly with her ass popping up and legs fold to the roof while reading a book. Man, we all had fun. No limits and no one to stop us. Along came a little kitten at midnight 00:00 on chia's birthday and grew as a part of us and a new member of our house. Some called it "becky", some called it "chinnu" and i called it "PUSS". Never hunted a single mouse till now. Grown fat eating kabab from bismailla and biryani from empires and on special treats he would eat from KFC. He played along with dogs and some wild cats. Crazy cat. Sometimes our water getting over and waiting for water up to 3 days.Then use drinking water for all purpose. Sometimes we would clean our house which would be so dirty that finding things would be tough. Our computer being filled with movies, games and PORN from all corners. Freedom was felt in all those who came to our house. My room, my house, my only come back home place and feel safe place when i stayed alone. A berry tree in our compound, looking at that young Nepali aunty from my room window and she looking at us with a look of want.
                                     I had fun and took life raw as it came. Remembered god whenever we thought of him. But i do thank him for showing me what some might just dream off. We all lived life. Those memories cannot be forgotten for they will be a wall to our life and friendship. I love you lord and thank you for giving me such wonderful moments with all those involved.
                                                                            Harvinder pal singh.
                      

Friday, October 31, 2008

Hey mirror


Hey mirror! can u show me ,me again,
em i lost again.
you had shown me the faces i had,
& now i miss you myself.

Hey mirror! where did i get lost?
when there was no other lane.
Found the reflections on me before i knew,
who was that someone? & u tell me it was U.

hey mirror! give me back my real me,
where hvae you taken it?.
I look at the stranger lookin down on me,
its not anyone else but me.

Hey mirror tell me there is someone else,
and comes to u when its not my turn?
Tell me who it was,
but then you tell me,... who else?

is he taking my soul,
or tryin to enter me.
hey mirror,
its so difficult
TO BE JUST ME,,......

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Not what u think of me...


I enjoy the madness that is scaring me.It is just an product of my own thoughts.Love hate,relationship etc,.Kill someone & find what it feels like. Ways go on their own way, they dont care.Come and ride with me.oceans of maze and beauty.Ways of world folds me from middle vertically. Ride with out traveling,do all without doing.
I see moments pass me with acid clearaty ie., acid in my eyes& burning down everything i see & admire. I wonder,wonder,wonder& still. Who is writting this? I know myself as someone who wants, who desire, who feels & who is dying to be better me.Well acid found a way to brain from my eyes & burning down the path. Now there is no filtering between seeing and believing.
What was that? No fear when em alone coz em never really alone. There is always an angel on my shoulder.
Its not madness or illusions, its just me inside out.
Darker then night
Blacker hen black
One in one
Just one,

Illusions again.
Welcome & help me.
Thank you LORD.